OPs mom definitely got high as hell before eating her steak.
“I was walking along the bank of a stream when I saw a mother otter with her cubs, a very endearing sight, I’m sure you’ll agree. And even as I watched, the mother otter dived into the water and came up with a plump salmon, which she subdued and dragged onto a half submerged log. As she ate it, while of course it was still alive, the body split and I remember to this day the sweet pinkness of its roes as they spilled out, much to the delight of the baby otters, who scrambled over themselves to feed on the delicacy. One of nature’s wonders, gentlemen. Mother and children dining upon mother and children. And that is when I first learned about evil. It is built into the very nature of the universe. Every world spins in pain. If there is any kind of supreme being, I told myself, it is up to all of us to become his moral superior.”
- Terry Pratchett
Mom tried the edibles.
We should normalize poetry.
Don’t you go aristotling on me
Food is fucking weird
Mom is stoned.
“What kind of mushrooms did you put in the mushroom sauce?”
Trip ≠ High
Cold?
Mom needs to learn to cook
“cold raw flesh”
Mom needs to learn to cook
Or maybe you just need to learn to read? This is clearly before cooking
Mom needs to
learn tostart the cook (I’m hungry)
Apparently the term “long pig” for human flesh originated because we taste like pork. I wonder if butchered cuts of human look like pork too.
I read a short story once where in the future they could synthesize foods (like Star Trek), and part of the challenge was to find the best flavors. At some point there is a combination formula going around that everyone agrees is the best tasting food ever. The end of the story is the person narrating who had figured out what the formula is simulating, and it’s people.
Also, Soylent Green is mentioned in the movie to be a very popular and preferred flavor, more than the past Soylent products.
I know Mythbusters used pig carcasses a ton because it was so similar to humans so I assume so.
Did it smell like pork?
Deep Thoughts by Werner Herzog.
Pre-vegan thoughts.
I feel for mom. I want to be vegan but I hate legumes. So instead of becoming protein deficient because I refuse to eat beans, I’ll just wait for lab-grown meat to finally get USDA (FDA?) approval.
There are many more vegetal protein sources though, and if you really can’t bear those either just eat eggs
Then they would be vegetarian, not vegan
Even chickpeas, lentils, or peanuts? I dislike western beans but I’m fine with these others which are (IMO) quite superior.
Especially chickpeas, lentils, and peanuts. Peanut butter is alright, though.
Valid!
Tofu, seitan, synthesized pea or soy protein… where I live, you can get vegan nonfat skyr that tastes every bit as funky as real skyr, and although it does have a hollow, oaty aftertaste, you can counter it pretty easily by adding a fat (I tend to carefully temper melted vegan butter and just add that) or using it with something (like jam, oats, and wheat germ/flaxseed) or as a thickener/creamy/cultured element in a recipe
I avoid soy protein because I heard it can promote estrogen production. Correct me if I’m wrong.
Plus I just like steak and octopus too much. I’ll wait for lab-grown meat.
Or pre-hunter.
I mean, has she tried her leg?
That’s because it is poetry. Mom might need a psych eval, but it’s still poetry (and I love it).
// I cooked a steak tonight // and was feeling alien // // How weird this gross piece // of cold raw flesh // on a cold plate is // // and I was thinking // I am just an animal // with the luxury of packaged flesh // and is it human flesh? // Like // I wouldn't know // We just believe it's a cow but // // we don't // // have fucking proof // // of anything // // // The knife went through the same // // as if it was my own leg // // -MomThe various spacings make this read to me like a William Shatner impression
Trying desperately to recall AP English classes to remember which poet was particularly renowned for doing unusual spacing and alignment in poems like this. Hemmingway?
ee cummings?
THAT’S THE GUY
Thank you!
Interesting, I didn’t know there was actually a guy kind of famous for that. These days, it always feels like a bit of a meme, like,
oh i wrote my text in a way that made you read it different now its pohetrykbyethx
Behutiful
that lady is dissociating. get her some therapy.
Fuck that, get her elected
Is your mom channeling Phillip K Dick?
OP’s mom definitely has a lot of dick in her, if that’s what you’re asking.
