I pick up the newspaper and everyday there’s a new horrible story about him that’s somehow become trite since all this oaf does is disparage other, loaf about, and take what he can from others to engorge himself. He’s ruining this country in every way, shape, and form but somehow he has millions of cult followers. He’s above any punishment yet forces us to suffer his existence like some sort of sick, kafkaesque joke. This absolute piece of shit has no redeeming qualities and yet we let him keep breathing air. It’s impossible to scroll online without seeing his gross orange face pop up on screen. I swear if I hear him say “I hate Mondays” or “I love lasagna” one more time I am going to lose it. Save us from this Garfieldian agony.
Be the change you want to see in the world! Somebody… Please.
Much like how Trump’s second term makes us wish for the innocence of his first term, what comes after Trump will be worse. Nothing ever gets better. All things deteriorate until they break and are replaced.
Even though things are worse than they have ever been, America today is the best it’s ever going to be again. When the history books are written about this era we will see the 2020’s as America’s second great antebellum.
This is my prepared bottles of rum, dedicated to when I no longer needs to share a planet with these bastards
Currently I have bottles for:
Trump, Putin, Musk, Murdoch and Orban.
The last one is what has been declared “The bottle of the unknown bad guy”, it is meant for when I find out about a person dying and my immediate feeling is “Good riddance”.
The last bottle should be for Nermal, that little annoying punk
The antagonist of the Garfield comic?
Yeah of course. This post is about Garfield
Well thats what I get when I wake up way too early…
I didn’t realize it was about Garfield until now, lol. My eyes glazed over the rest of the paragraph when I assumed it was about Trump.
Yes, Nermal was the evilest, everyone despised Nermal.
I have a whole ass case of assorted fine Lebanese wine for Natenyahu, stashed away in my family’s old home in the mountains.
Here’s hoping he doesn’t get to it before I do.
What about Peter Thiel?
What about Vance and the whole heritage foundation?
Vance is a sock puppet.
You celebrate main perpetrators and orchestrators not the goons.
Me, what?
I was just calling out Vance since he might well be WAY worse than trump if given the chance and the heritage foundation as driver in the back; the tech bros as people helping them since they see goals align.
I think this is a misunderstanding.
None of this comment is particularly targeted at you.
The you at the start of the second sentence is a general you, not you you.
Ah, I see, thanks!
I love this idea. Celebratory hate bottles. It’s perfect.
This is doubly appropriate, because I loathe rum. I may unashamedly steal this idea, but with whisky :)
Top tip, see if you can get a present box like this, with the printed ribbons it looks really professional.
To print the ribbons I used a Brother label maker with cloth bands you can print on.
One mistake I made was using a sans serif font, a proper serif font like Times New Roman would have looked way classies
Best brand of rum I’ve ever tried. Their Jamaican casks are my favorites, and the OFTD Overproof and 3 Stars for when I can’t find those.
I can think of at least 3 more, and that’s without including my country’s politics
Alex Karp
Peter Thiel
NetanyahuCome on, everyone, join in!
I love how so many people clearly didn’t read the entire post, lol.
I read it all and it doesn’t make sense. Garfield really doesn’t fit most of the things said, like he isn’t online all the time, isn’t ruining America, etc.
I guess that makes it a shit post.
I may have Garfield Derangement Syndrome
“Isn’t running America” jfc millions of dollars was spent for a sick slow-rolling display of his delusions of prowess in Kennywood. He got his own prime-time TV show. His fame and existence is a testament to the gullibility of the USA population.
But you can find Garfield online at literally any time? Go check for yourself!
And it’s subjective, but Garfield is definitely ruining America, in my view?
“America’s favorite cat?” I didn’t vote for him!
I’ve decided to hold parties for when horrible people die. Fuck them.
There’s an appropriate song called “Gonna Throw a Party (When You Die)” by a band called Attractive Eighties Women.
John just needs to man up and take out Garfield. Odie is too dumb to do it.
John can’t even pull the trigger when Garfield has embraced his true eldritch horror.
Fucking weak John.
Nermal is waging psychological warfare
Nermal is the true pwoer behind the throne.
President Garfield!? More like President Nermal.
You had me in the first 90%, not gonna lie.
Not a lot of people read all the way to the end, huh…
I was told there’s an English lord who was so reviled that when he died they rolled a massive rock onto his grave lest he ever rise again (rumors that he dabbled in magic might have informed the decision).
That would be appropriate for Trump. Or similarly, bury him in a deep geologic repository (where we put our vitrified spent fissile fuel beneath signs warning THIS IS NOT A PLACE OF HONOR ) as a reminder of how we never want another person like him to exist.
Nah just throw him in a dumpster and be done with it
That would rob countless generations of the ability to piss on his grave.
Hang Him from something and let that fucker rot.
Fine, I’ll set it on fire with kerosene. Just in case.
Why wait to roll a huge boulder?
That story gives Gruntilda from Banjo-Kazooie vibes
Its so nice to be able to say you hope the fascist dies.
We now live in such a world where you can’t wish for evil dictators to die lest the billionaire who owns the platforms you use has his sensibilities upset.
Did you also get banned from Reddit?
I did!
No
I have multiple accounts there and also realize that if I get banned I cant just encourage people to check out decentralized forms of communication
But that will get you banned too
Have never seen any rules about that nor been banned, and I do it pretty frequently.
I don’t think they’re going to display that rule because then that would be free advertisement in the rules. They don’t want people to know about that at all.
An old quote I remember often: “the best thing to come out of his mouth will be his last breath”
Not only will I celebrate it, I want to do it where his grieving followers can see my exultation.
Well then he better not die during his term or under a GOP admin, because if people lost their jobs over Kirk, I can’t even imagine what would happen to you if you celebrated the death of their dear leader.
I’m self-employed, so nobody can fire me but me, and my boss’ politics are the same as mine.
In fact, I won’t hire MAGAs, and if I ever found out that one of my employees was MAGA, they’d be fired immediately. I won’t tolerate such low character around me, my business, or my other employees. There’s no telling what a person that stupid and mean will do.
Maybe Garfield can be our Winnie the Pooh
I’m gonna cry my eyes out when I lose the fat narcissistic orange I have at home.
Cat tax, pay up.
My Garfield is 19 years strong. He’s the best boy.
OP delivers… what a glorious day!
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