The Baker provides a service for a fee, the CEO denies service to inflate wealth (at least the ones that should be worrying).

I liked the actual smell of burning cigarettes, but the stake smoke that lingered on your clothes and hair after a night bar hopping was gnarly.

I’m my head a doodle bug is more like a beetle with long segmented legs that kind of bobs around as it doodles along.

I went for a whole month drying my hands with only independent research and the results were similar to using paper towels.

I miss the clutches of people that would congregate in smoking areas on breaks at work, kinda forced to socialize but all walks of life would be tied together by their shared vice.

Now the smoking area at work has dwindled so I feel like a pariah sucking on my electric nicotine pacifier for a couple minutes, staring at my phone and ignoring the other pariahs that come outside.

Hell, I think I met the larger part of my 2000s friend group striking up conversations outside of bars when you could no longer smoke inside.

Sorry I’m romanticizing am unhealthy dirty habit, but I do think that we, in the US at least, have vilified one more means of social connection.

Game Production Manager: “Nobody is going home until we get this bug ironed out. You don’t have to come in this weekend if you don’t want, but we won’t renew your contract if you didn’t.”

I’m imagining nothing but monkey bars over a bottomless pit between the subway entrance and the yellow strip by the train doors.

We can just set up reservations in unused land in Oklahoma for those that don’t own land. /S

Hey guys, I’m Jeremy Queaye. Did you get the dozen similar tickets I posted before lunch? I have a few more…

Elon Nepobabyoligarchson.

The Arabic Ibn works as well, unless I’m mistaken. Like McMurphy, IbnRasshad.

Correct me if I’m wrong as I’d like to know!

The names Trent, Trent Shippinrecieven.

I feel like it’s only a matter of time until I see a headline that says, ‘White House votes A-trocities A-OK!’

Just use bleach! It kills 99.9 percent of germs.

There is a video I will not point you to, because a hundred vegans probably have already, that show how sad and disgusting factory farming in the US is. I wouldn’t drink anything that came out of one of those depressing animal factories unless it had been processed to hell and back.

There are better options on the market, but the average American is going to pay a buck or two less for a gallon from the milk factory. Same thing with eggs, meat.

Conscious food choices are a luxury, here.

People like my boomer mother will buy a gallon of milk and expect it to be good for 2+weeks.

She is part of the reason I do a small shopping every couple days and only buy what I need for the foreseeable future. An entire generation of Americans that are used to everything being so pumped with preservatives that we can eat a Twinkie that rolled under the couch last presidential election.

Yet, we have to scrub eggs of their natural coating at the farm, requiring them to be refrigerated.

Food regulation in the US hasn’t moved very far from the 60s.

Show me a single law that does not permit the wearing of a tasteful pearl necklace.

Even better!

Another point that conspiracy bros will bring up is that fluoride is a toxic byproduct of aluminum manufacture and dumping it into the water supply is a cheap way for Alcoa to dispose of it benevolently.

Are we cooked?