what up?
true, he’s not allowed to be better than me at anything
He’s better at losing gracefully.
So… Any women in this thread who like losers? I’m single and ready to mingle!
Misspelling “loser” is my favorite part of that post.
The truly pathetic ones never feel “ready to mingle”. Don’t ask me how I know
“Well now, how about the idea of you letting me disappoint you in an otherwise noble attempt to please?”
If that was true, I wouldn’t be painfully isolated and alone.
She loves public displays of flounder.
Weeping here to pictures of frogs isn’t public enough.
Or perhaps she loves someone who tries and fails?
Failure without trying is just giving up.
Is there any difference?
You ain’t meeting anyone shit posting here…
Oh God. that is my husband in a nutshell.
When he started to cook, (I can burn water… ugh) he was so earnest and flopped many times… (among the notables were a mushroom velvet that turned into liquid potting soil, apple-salt loaf, eggs bhopal, onions napalm, chicken hiroshima…)
It’s sweet and I love him to bits because at least he tried and when he finally got it…
Dayummm!!!
ayyy that was my last partner’s dynamic with me too! it’s a legit strategy
Damn, loved that exchange. Thanks for sharing.
thanks, back on reddit people said I made it up 😀 she just is that funny
Oh that’s glorious! Nice.
That’s basically me now, but without the girl. Hoping it pays off someday and until then, I can have some fun!
As long as he doesn’t then try to somehow blame missing it on you.
I have a friend like that who’ll be looking at guy and thinking “wow, what a loser… I want to embrace him so bad”.
I’d identify her as “pitysexual”. 🌚
She single?
If she’s not you’re going to be so cute to her when you hear the news.
- She’s not.
- If she was, guy coming to a country that is a goddamn warzone, to chase a girl who likes losers, would definitely land among hottest things by pitysexual standards.
“I’m not afraid to die, but I am afraid to die alone.”
/hurriedly jots down notes
😔
Where are the women like that near me?
Or she’s into domming.
Maybe they want to be the competent one, but I can also see the appeal in someone who is comfortable with who they are and happy to try things they aren’t good at.
Personally I find competence in something hot, I love when guys are good at doing something. But nobody is good at everything and willingness to step out of your comfort zone is also hot.
Close: They wish to be incompetent together.
Also you’ve just described "If they can’t be handsome. They should at least find you handy. " Which is advice passed down since the times of old
Honestly that’s how I always thought successful relationships were supposed to be.
Just 2 incompetent and imperfect people choosing to stumble through life together because you compliment the other’s incompetencies, and it makes stumbling through life just a little easier and more enjoyable.
Is there a pattern to people like this?
Sure, love is blind and different people have different reasons, but it’d be really interesting to find out there also happens to be a “bang-the-pathetic-one” gene.
One side of it is the vulnerability and embarrassment. Like, swap the genders and you’ve got the old-school “ditzy secretary” trope, “Oh no, I spilled coffee all over your important papers! You’re not mad at me are you?” There’s probably no specific gene anymore than there’s a “attracted to ditzy secretary” gene.
There can be other dynamics at play with the way men tend to put on fronts. Guy fails at something, the front drops, they’re suddenly in unfamiliar territory, you’re seeing a side they don’t show to the world. You can see how they handle stress, like do they throw the controller or do they get mopey or what, it can show emotional maturity.
Unearned confidence or overconfidence can also be hot. Like, guy who isn’t actually that good at anything but believes in himself 100% and bounces back from disappointment always looking to prove himself and show off, there’s something kind of endearing about that, and it might make them more approachable and relatable than someone who’s actually just good at everything.
Basically there’s a lot of stuff it can tap into and the D/s dynamic is often a big factor but not necessarily the only one.
I’m not looking it up, but there was a thing I remember seeing a little while ago that there literally is a biological motive towards women seeking out men with pathetic traits.
It’s to do with seeking out potential partners that are either submissive or dominant, depending on what you’re into. It’s a non specific to gender desire to form a pairing with a clear dominant party. I don’t think it’s universal or anything, but it’s something people are into.
Pretty sure I saw this through a look into why women are into waterboy from dispatch actually.
my ex said that my attempts at savoir faire were endearing and that she just liked that I was okay with not being the smartest or funniest person in the room. I assume to attract that type you have to embody this kind of energy? she might have been entirety unique in what she wanted or saw in me.
but she did also say there is a genuine thing where some women just fuck a guy out of pity, so maybe I was one of those. there also was discourse a few years back before covid about whether pathetic dudes are more loyal because they see their partners as gods or if the confidence goes to their ego and they get notions after the first taste of any positive attention. either way, seems like a risky gamble
That’s funny, because whenever I try to be self-deprecating, women just call me insufferable…
gotta know your audience, you know there isn’t one thing that everyone finds attractive
You’re right, I’ll just learn how to be a mind reader before I make any attempts at humor
theres a big difference in being self depricating and making light about sucking at something.
Which one is the socially acceptable one?
making light…
you see that (missed) shot? haha nba here I come!
its funny cuz you missed.
I feel you, dude. I’ve got autism and trying to gauge people for what kind of vibe is going to land is insanely difficult. internet dating helped me so much back before it went to shit. I feel pretty lost now
Yeah, I’m at the point where I just assume the vibe will never land, so I don’t even try to interact with people anymore. Hence I get all my social interaction on lemmy.
Am I pathetic enough yet? Or have I blown so far past the threshold that it’s just sad to watch?
I think your story isn’t over yet. maybe because I’m hoping mine isn’t either, but also our lives are seldom just a single straight line to ultimate failure.
until you reach that point, have a hug 🫂 we contain multitudes of possibility and I hope you get to encounter something new about yourself soon
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To be fair there are even more men who are afraid of women looking more successful than them, but I’mm sure that’s different ballpark
Louis Tully was cute as a button!
