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LadyButterfly she/her@piefed.blahaj.zone to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days ago

It's true...

piefed.cdn.blahaj.zone

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It's true...

piefed.cdn.blahaj.zone

LadyButterfly she/her@piefed.blahaj.zone to Microblog Memes@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days ago
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  • ragebutt@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 days ago

    Entirely untrue. Any Doritos aficionado knows that sometimes you get a chip that’s like just covered in flavor dust and just a delight and like the yin and the yang some chips then must suffer and be paltry, a plain and bland corn tortilla chip that is not very good if it’s not slathered in a bath of msg.

    All things come and go. Balance, the universe, chakras, etc.

    (Also slathered in a bath is somewhat literal, they basically spray the flavoring on Doritos)

    • Nasan@sopuli.xyz
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      2 days ago

      I’ve had bags that were entirely lacking in flavor dust. Not even at the bottom of the bag, someone else out there got the bulk of my flavor dust. That, or I got a bad run where they decided to cut costs by robbing me of my sodium fix.

      I’ve learned to never trust Doritos or any particular brand of chip ever again.

    • Snailpope@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      I came here to say this, but don’t believe I could have stated it quite so eloquently. You sir are a gentleman and a scholar.

    • Icytrees@lemmy.today
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      2 days ago

      I had to amend my will because of this.

      If my corpse doesn’t get shoved into the crematorium slathered in dorito juice I’m gonna screech cosmic truths in the nightmares of my loved ones.

    • Dasus@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Iirc I’ve never tasted doritos, but all the similar chips have been shit at least.

      Plain salted tortilla chips can be nice though, given you got some salsa. But that cancerous yellow dust that people seem to enjoy?

  • myotheraccount@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Sounds like a skill issue: just store the fruit outside the fridge for two months, and it will all taste consistently the same.

  • nocturne@slrpnk.net
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    3 days ago

    I have never had a bad granny Smith apple.

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      2 days ago

      Honey crisp apples are where it’s at. Have never had a bad one

      • Stop Forgetting It@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        2 days ago

        Honey crisp apples are amazing, I get the 4lb bag at Costco and they are gone in under a week.

        • stiephelando@discuss.tchncs.de
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          2 days ago

          Try cosmic crisp. It’s a relatively new variety that was bred from the honey crisp

    • Rusty@lemmy.ca
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      2 days ago

      Red Delicious are also consistent. They are always red and always taste like shit.

      • Dasus@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Mine’s pretty refreshing, actually.

        Got two Red Delicious and one Golden Delicious (looks like Granny Smith but is a bit softer) for the tartness.

        Mmm.

    • state_electrician@discuss.tchncs.de
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      2 days ago

      Meh. When they’re a dark green they’re incredibly sour. They need to be slightly yellowish, then they’re amazing.

      • NaibofTabr@infosec.pub
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        3 days ago

        Men … They need to be slightly yellowish…

        • Nythos@sh.itjust.works
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          2 days ago

          I like my men jaundiced.

          • potoooooooo ☑️@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            You can’t spell jaundice without juice.

          • Jakeroxs@sh.itjust.works
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            2 days ago

            You gotta take those lemons, and stuff them down somebodies throat until they see yella

            • PunnyName@lemmy.world
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              2 days ago

              https://youtu.be/Dt6iTwVIiMM

              Relevant

      • nocturne@slrpnk.net
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        2 days ago

        they’re incredibly sour.

        They are perfect.

    • JetpackJackson@feddit.org
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      2 days ago

      I am now obligated to post https://applerankings.com/

    • unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de
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      2 days ago

      I can literally only eat Topaz apples at this point. Any other type will just rot in my house until i throw it away. Best variety out there for people that like a lil sour.

    • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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      2 days ago

      Gravenstein on the other hand… they often get heart rot.

    • CallMeAnAI@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Then you ain’t eating them often.

    • Zirconium@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      They make me accidentally bite my cheek every time I eat one

    • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      I absolutely have. They can be as mealy as the rest of them

    • aeronmelon@lemmy.worldM
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      I have, but it’s real hard. They’re almost always great.

  • CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    It’s why people go eat at chains in the suburbs.

    • PunnyName@lemmy.world
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      Also the only thing that exists in the suburbs.

  • StinkyFingerItchyBum@lemmy.ca
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    3 days ago

    Give me fruit or give me death!

    • JeSuisUnHombre@lemmy.zip
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      3 days ago

      Literally, scurvy can kill you

      • Lag@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        Just get a monthly suppliment bag of Doritos VitaPowder™ it has everything you need.

        • I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          But does it have electrolytes??

          • ryedaft@sh.itjust.works
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            2 days ago

            Yes, a significant percentage of Doritos is electrolytes

            Unfortunately, it’s more common to have too many electrolytes rather than too few

            • potoooooooo ☑️@lemmy.world
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              2 days ago

              Why, because y’all are scared I’ll get electrical powers?

            • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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              2 days ago

              deleted by creator

      • Anivia@feddit.org
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        2 days ago

        Yeah, but you don’t necessarily need to eat fruit to prevent scurvy.

        I don’t eat any fruit at all (like absolutely zero), and I’m still alive

  • thelivefive@startrek.website
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    Y’all can’t tell when fruit is bad and just not eat it then?

    • rumba@lemmy.zip
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      Talking about mealy apples and artificially ripened blueberries. A lot of it depends on where you live.

      I spent a couple years in Florida, all the fruit and produce was absolutely amazing. Most of the stuff grew locally or not far away. But by the tme you get to the mid-atlantic, you can’t find a fresh tomato shy of a farm stand and the right month, all our fruit ships from south america. When they have to ship produce a long way, you get the under-ripened / artifically ripend crap. The growing seasons are so marginal that you can hardly get local fresh produce.

      • thelivefive@startrek.website
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        That’s a good point. I buy most of my produce at small natural food stores. It’s normally better, but more expensive for sure. Yeah supermarket produce can often be a let down.

    • FridaySteve@lemmy.world
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      Not rotten, just bad tasting. You have to taste it.

  • locahosr443@lemmy.world
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    Sure, if you like the texture of fried cardboard

    • porous_grey_matter@lemmy.ml
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      2 days ago

      No, whether you like it or not they are the same

  • Broadfern@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    My exception to this is grapes.

    The texture of uncooked apples makes me gag 100% of the time though so I’m happy to hand those off to whoever likes them

    • derekabutton@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      There is nothing worse than a soggy or extra sour grape in the bowl

  • Fushuan [he/him]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 days ago

    Ironic that an Alita stan account wrote that…

    • Bananigans@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 days ago

      I demand my sequel. [̲̅⁠$̲̅⁠(̲̅⁠ ͡⁠ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ⁠)̲̅⁠$̲̅⁠]

  • applebusch@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    Enshitification has entered the chat. It’s only a matter of time.

    • MissJinx@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      dude there was a kellogs cereal that was amazing, had oats, corn flakes etc and also tiny bits of chocolate to make it sweet. I would eat that stuff everyday. Loved it. Than they started adding more and more oats and less and less chocolat. at the end it was only oats. WHY?!

  • ashughes@feddit.uk
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    Praising Doritos for being consistently disgusting. Weird flex but okay.

  • Mrkawfee@feddit.uk
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    Pulpy apples are on my shit list

  • wowwoweowza@lemmy.world
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    Doritos will always taste like poison… because they are.

  • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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    deleted by creator

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