• Asafum@feddit.nl
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    10 months ago

    So a murderer gets replies and I couldn’t even get a match before I gave up, sounds about right lmao

      • SuddenDownpour@sh.itjust.works
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        10 months ago

        Unironically this. Tinder is built in such a way that it makes appearance count far more than it does in almost any other environment. Add to that that there’s a huge disproportion between male and female users. For most people, Tinder is just a miserable experience.

        • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          I was married before any of these apps became available, so I’ve never experienced them. How do people deal with the Instagram filter effect? I’m assuming everyone is using every filter they can for their profile pictures. So what happens when you actually meet someone in real life without all those filters? Does everyone just flee in terror at the arrival of their date?

          • Grumpy@sh.itjust.works
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            10 months ago

            Yes. That’s pretty much what I would do. Flee.

            It’s a giant waste of time for everyone. It’s honestly horrible and I wish there was a way to seriously penalize people who do that. I’d say >80% of the girls use filter effect. I can’t tell guys since I don’t look at guy profiles. Though, guys would have better effect taking a pic in front of a random Porsche parked on the street and lie about their height than using filters.

            You can tell people are using filters most of the time once you’ve seen enough. Lot of them are pretty obvious. And some of them are completely obvious as it still has the filter’s name literally on the photo.

            I would absolutely prefer to match on below avg girl with real face than hot girl with fake filter face. With real photos, I know what I’m getting into, and found them to be much more down to earth as well.

            • kameecoding@lemmy.world
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              10 months ago

              It’s not just the filters, how photogenic you are also has a huge effect there can be a massive difference between what you see on the tinder pics and what’s in real life and it goes both ways, as in it can be much better but also much worse

          • Kalothar@lemmy.ca
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            9 months ago

            I mean it’s kind of rare, you usually end up snapchatting at some point or whatever, I had a good amount of dates from Tinder and I never felt tricked really as far as I can recall.

      • Asafum@feddit.nl
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        10 months ago

        That is indeed the rule.

        I couldn’t even get conventionally unattractive people to respond lol

        I mean could I be the problem? Sure, I hate myself more than any person that exists or ever has existed lol

        • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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          10 months ago

          It is more nuanced.

          I’m what you would consider handsome, until you take a picture of me. Then I look just fucked, I don’t know what it is about my face but it has to be in motion.

          You might just be better in person. Don’t know, but I think it’s all about perspective. No one will like you if you can’t find a way to like yourself.

          • Asafum@feddit.nl
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            10 months ago

            I think that’s part of it to be honest. When I take a picture I look absolutely atrocious, no angles or lighting save me from looking ugly as hell lol

          • Grumpy@sh.itjust.works
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            10 months ago

            You likely don’t know how to take pictures. There was one “coach” that I’ve seen who basically said take 100 selfies a day to get skilled at taking pictures of yourself. As well as when taken by someone else. That way you know what poses, angles and expressions work and don’t work for you. There’s obviously more about it, but point is that everything needs practice, and a lot of it.

            • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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              10 months ago

              Is it odd that I feel weird practicing taking pictures of myself? What you’re saying makes perfect sense, I just feel grimy in the doing.

              • Grumpy@sh.itjust.works
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                10 months ago

                It’s not odd imo. I feel weird about it too. But I can’t help but accept it as a fact which works. All the insta addicted people essentially do this every day for years and it’s why they’re able to produce good pictures.

              • VirtualOdour@sh.itjust.works
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                9 months ago

                It’s normal socialization into the puritanical slave cult mentality which dominates popular culture, men especially aren’t allowed to be seen to care about appearance while simultaneously being heavily judged for any deviation from the accepted norms.

                I think it’s actually a radical act against the established patriarchy to take the time to learn to look your best in selfies and to pose for pictures. Learn your body, use beauty products, think about what outfits suit you and what they say about you.

                • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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                  9 months ago

                  I think that your reasoning likely applies to some or many, but it is in no way reflective of why I dislike preening myself.

                  I’ve experienced excessive vanity, I’ve experienced blatant narcissism. I also recognized the capacity for both within myself, which is what makes posing in front of a mirror feel so slimy to me. I just don’t know if others feel this way, or have had similar reactions.

        • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          Sure, I hate myself more than any person that exists or ever has existed lol

          This generally isn’t something you’d open with when seeking a date, but you might attract some hawt goth chicks, so it’ll possibly pay off.

        • Instigate@aussie.zone
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          10 months ago

          Sounds like you’re the sort of person who does well in candid pictures. In order to get a great profile picture, have someone you know take photos of you while you’re having a coffee and a chat with a friend for fifteen minutes or so and try to ignore the camera as much as possible. I definitely look much better candid than posed; I honestly believe that most people do!

  • FewerWheels@mander.xyz
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    10 months ago

    At the risk of doxing myself, I share a uncommon name with a serial murderer. I’m not a serial murderer. So if you googled me, you can ignore that.

  • perviouslyiner@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    She had asked: What is he? A friend or an enemy?"

    The alethiometer answered: He is a murderer."

    When she saw the answer, she relaxed at once. He could find food, and show her how to reach Oxford, and those were powers that were useful, but he might still have been untrustworthy or cowardly. A murderer was a worthy companion. She felt as safe with him as she’d done with Iorek Byrnison the armoured bear"

    • riot@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      Oh, man, this really makes me want to re-read the entire series again.

      I’ve recently gotten into audiobooks for the first time in my life. I wonder if there’s a quality production of His Dark Materials.

        • feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          I read the first one, and was really let down. I waited twenty years for those books to be released and it was so bad it felt like a slap in the face, to the point I became concerned for the author’s cognitive health as I couldn’t think of any other explanation for the precipitous decline in quality.

        • riot@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Wow, I had no idea! I gotta look into those too. Thanks for the head’s up!

      • Nefara@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        The audible version was decent, I reread them all on audiobook ahead of the HBO series and wasn’t wowed but I wasn’t annoyed either. That part in Amber Spyglass still made me cry so that’s a kind of endorsement.

  • Son_of_dad@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    My neighbor just realized he rented out his house to a guy who is under investigation for multiple murders. He found out when cops kept showing up looking to question him and the neighbors called to notify him. I simply googled his tenant’s name and all the news stories, criminal records and mug shots came up, so I guess the landlord was just a dumbass.

  • Etterra@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    There are people who actively pursue relationships with convicts while they’re in prison. Nothing about her post is surprising.

  • FiniteBanjo@lemmy.today
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    10 months ago

    You passed up a date with NFL MVP holder of the record for the single-season yards-per-game average at 143.1 and a famous actor, OJ Simpson?

  • corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca
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    9 months ago

    My buddy was named Chuck. It seemed just a little juvenile but he said Mr Manson seemed too posh. Yeah, he came up on internet searches too, and people needed to overlook the results.

  • Gork@lemm.ee
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    10 months ago

    Some people are into that sort of thing.

    I don’t understand it, but I’m not about to yuck someone’s yum.